"ITS CLASSIFIED" - HOW IT REALLY WORKS

If you ask someone what they do for a living and they respond its classified without laughing and then proceeding to tell you what they actually do I would be willing to place large amounts of money and possibly a stupid tattoo on the fact they're lying. I know I know all those internet spies and heroes just got smacked in the virtual mouth.  Now take off the +5 cloak of fanboy-ism and think this through.

If you do things that are supposed to be a secret you probably shouldn't run around saying you do secret stuff. "But Logan they didn't tell me the secrets they told me it was classified." Showmanship and stagecraft have been used as long as mankind and more especially womankind have been around. Ask someone that works in marketing if telling someone something is secret doesn't peak interest. That is exactly my point if you think about it. Someone says they do something secret so people will look up to them or think their cooler than they really are. 

There are several uses for a cover story and none of them include getting people to pay you for your super secret ninja patch that only the masters of the Vulcan death grip can achieve. If you don't have clearance to check the clearance of other people (yes there's a system for that) then it doesn't matter what you say. When someone recently brought up a popular internet personality as a question on if they actually do what they claim tons of folks jumped in to defend them. The problem is not one of the people vouching for them held a clearance or had access to verify a clearance. Lots of feelings got hurt in the process of pointing out that unfortunately it doesn't matter how much you like someone if they cant be vetted. You can agree or not agree with the person casting doubt but at the end of the day you're either in the know or you're a fan on the outside looking in. 

You see telling someone your occupation is classified is a solid guarantee that they will look deeper into what you do. Pair that with a locked up or fake profile and stories with little to no facts and you have yourself a solid fan base. The problem is both those things are the opposite of what you want if you're actually in any sort of clandestine role.  The guy shaking his head in the back of the room while the cool guy talks is more likely to be in the actual role than the guy in the spotlight. So now you know and knowing is half the battle so the next time someone starts spouting off about being a cool guy just remember that cool guys have covers.